The Adventures of Malyus and His Merry Men:
Looking For A Ride
Knowing how long it would take to make it to the Undead City, we decided to acquire some means
of travel. So we went to Gunther's Keep to purchase or steal some horses. Upon arrival we noted
that Robert the Warhammer's army was gone, and Gunther's Keep was locked up. The Keep was guarded
by Elves. We got inside, and started to massacre Elves. Some of the Elves rode horses, but
we were not able to find any that didn't have a rider. So we decided to leave the city on foot.
Because we couldn't continue to fight the Elves, since Krytir, Mangra, and Malyus were out of
their offensive power.
We left the city the same way we entered, through the hole under the western wall. When Blurp
emerged on the other side of the wall, he encountered an elf that he realized was dead when he
removed his short sword from it's back. We retrieved the wolves and Blurp's chariot and fled
to the west with a newly acquired elven horse. We finally stopped to rest, so we made camp in
the woods. We found a baby Kobold in a basket, and Kyrtir has adobted it. During the night,
Lynxiepoo spotted a deer and killed it with his bow. When Malyus woke up, he skinned it, cut
off some meat, embalmed it, and then animated it as a Zombie Deer. We continued our journey
towards the Undead City, and when night fell we spotted a large group of travellers down in a
valley... with a stable full of horses.
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Impin' Ain't Easy
We entered the encampment at night, unsure whether we would steal or barter for the horses.
We were stopped by a guard and he informed us that we would have to wait until morning to try
to purchase the horses. So we made camp inside one of their tents. The Elder finally agreed
to trading us five horses for our winter wolf pelt, if we go find their wizard who stole their
religious pipe. We eventually agreed to go look for the wizard, who was not very far to the
We came across a small group of trees in the middle of the plains, so we entered the forest
to find the wizard. We came across a deer with an arrow through it's head, though it's walking
around; believing it undead, Krytir tried to gain control of it, and this only enraged the beast.
The deer charged at Krytir, and Ahlara got in the deers way and it disappeared just before reaching
her. So we continued our trek through the forest. We found a man in a pit, who once
again we discovered to be dead after Blurp pulled his short sword from the man's back. A crow
was in the tree mocking us, and Blurp tried to capture it but failed, so we continue through
forest. We finally came across a hill, and there were two deer, two squirrels, a crow,
and a raven trying to get us to leave the forest. They gave us a pipe and sent us out
of the forest. But then the pipe disappeared. We went back inside the forest to confront
these creatures, who transformed back into imps. A battle ensued, and we came out victorious.
One of the imps fled the battle and retreated to the wizard's hill, and another was captured
by Blurp. We pursued the fleeing imp, and entered the wizard's laboratory. We spotted the pipe
on a summoning circle in the middle of the room, and the wizard and the imp cowering in the corner.
Malyus treated the wizard as a marshmellow and roasted him, thus causing the summoning portal
to lose it's integrity. So the remaining imp was pulled back into the depths of hell that it
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We returned to the encampment with the marble pipe in hand. The pipe was returned to the villagers
and we acquired our horses. So we went to the south, in search of the Great North Road, which
will lead us to the Windsword in the Undead City. We came upon a creek, and Krytir used her
Horn of the Tridents, bet you'd never expected to hear those words coming out of anyone's mouth,
to calm the water so we could cross. We eventually found the Great North Road and proceeded
on our journey. As night fell, Blurp and Ahlara spotted two big creatures blocking the road,
so we approached them. They said "This is the Road of One-Tooth, and you must pay a toll. You
on One-Tooth's dirt, pay toll. One-umm-Tooth's One-Dirt-Road-umm-Tooth's... you pay toll."
Blurp went up to the Orcs and started to play with them, pulled on their spears, got smacked
for it, pulled on the spears some more, and noticed their previous tolls hanging from their hips.
"Shiny Shiny!" They demanded a toll from Malyus, so Malyus reached into his backpack for the
payment, in the form of two skeletal cats... the battle didn't last long. We hid the bodies
and made camp off the road. During the last watch of the night, more Orcs came along to have
a changing of the guards. Blurp went out first, jumped in front of the two Orcs, and said "Blurp's
Dirt, pay toll." The Orcs laughed at the Kobold, and Blurp's response was "Blurp's Dirt, pay toll."
The Orcs noticed Mangra and Ahlara coming straight for them, but didn't notice Malyus and Krytir
heading south of them, so they fled into an ambush.
We continued our journey along the Great North Road and came upon Brick City. Blurp found the
thieves guild, and went through his training to become a thief. Lynxiepoo was afraid of losing
his head, and we didn't want to spend the money to stay in an inn, so we camped outside the city
until Blurp's training was complete.
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Return of the Undead
We left Brick City, a place just north of where this whole story began, on our last leg of the
journey to the Undead City. With Malyus and Lynxiepoo being the only two surviving members who
have been to the Undead City, Malyus took the lead and led us right to the city. Upon arrival,
we went around to the western side of the city and entered through a broken wall which put us
next to the Inn. Inside the Inn we spotted the Innkeeper, the same tongueless Innkeeper from
before, and I ordered everyone to kill him, but my order came too late... Blurp's sword was
already in the Innkeeper's back. We explored the Inn and found two Zombies, which Krytir commanded.
We then explored the Stable, Church, and houses. In the houses we discovered more Zombies, which
we disposed of. Next was the Castle, with a portcullis. All of us grabbed onto the gate and
lifted it. Then Blurp went under the gate and raised it the proper way. On the western side
of the castle was a locked bedroom, which the Thief could not pick and the Barbarian could not
bash but the Wizard could Knock. Inside the bedroom we found a bed, dresser, and all the other
usual items in a bedroom. Inside the bed's matress were . . . feathers. Inside the dresser's
drawers were . . . clothes. Inside Lynxiepoo's mind was . . . nothing. So we went to the eastern
side of the castle and came across a storage room, with a locked door leading to another room.
The Thief tried to pick it, and got shot with a couple darts, the Barbarian could not bash it,
and the Wizard already used Knock; but thanks to the Book of Infinite Spells, Malyus turned the
stone wall into the flesh wall. After cutting through the fleshy wall, we found a treasure room.
Inside the treasury was some Art, a couple Gems, lots of Silver, tons of Copper, a Scroll, and
There is only one way left for us to go, through the double doors leading into the main chamber
with the Hecuva. We opened the double doors, which revealed a large dark room, lit only by a
couple candles. In the center of the room is a large stone throne, upon which sat the Hecuva.
There were six robed figure bowing before him. The Hecuva arose and commanded the six robed Hecuvas
to attack. Krytir being a cleric, was attacked by three of them, while Mangra, Lynxiepoo, and
Ahlara each got one as well. Malyus went to Krytir's rescue by casting Burning Hands
on the three attacking Hecuvas and her :), which killed all three Hecuvas.
Ahlara took out the other three attacking Hecuvas, and Blurp and I took out the lead Hecuva with
two short sword hits, a Magic Missile, and a Mighty Blow from Malyus with his dagger.
Behind the throne is a trap door leading underground. At the bottom of the stairway is a dead
body and a stone door. The body has a map and a message. Hours, game time and real time, are
spent trying to open the stone door. Blurp took off the hinges, drove spikes into walls, hung
himself from the spikes and finally got the door to come off. Beyond the door was a hallway that
made a U-turn and opened up into a room filled with mist so we couldn't see. We followed the
left wall through the maze until we came upon a door, which Malyus Knocked open. As the spell
chunkers approached the area outside the door our heads started to hurt, and we started to become
confused. Beyond the door the confusion was worse, the mist was gone, and all we found was some
paintings on the walls. We continued to follow the left wall, always taking a left when we came
upon a Y, T, or X intersection. We found a couple dead ends, spotted a Will-o-wisp going down
a right corridor (which we don't follow because it is going to the right), Blurp fell down a
pit but luckily for him we were still tied together so Ahlara, played by Tyra, pulled him up.
Then we came upon a door, which Blurp detected a trap on. He attempted to disarm it but failed
and the poison nearly killed him. Inside the room was the Windsword and lots of other
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Trick or Treat
On the journey back from the Undead City we encountered a couple trolls wielding children from
Farmville. Krytir Entagled the beasts, Lynxiepoo shot a couple arrows, and Mangra threw
some Greek Fire. As the trolls got near the edge of the entanglement, Malyus used Burning
Hands to engulf the trolls and Ahlara, played by Tyra, and Lynxiepoo chopped them down the
rest of the way as Mangra whipped out the torch to burn the trolls. We continued on to Brick
City and were approached by the town watch outside the city. They informed us of stories of
the Orc Army heading this way, and asked if we new any information... we didn't know much,
except that we were standing near Blurp's Dirt. They let us pass and we headed to the overly
crowded Brick City. The church was full of people wanting a blessing, but we had a wounded
man... err kobold. So I bribed an acolyte to get us to the priest now. He neutralized Blurp's
poison, which cost us 100 gold for the bribe and 500 gold for the healing, so we went to the
magic shop to identify our new loot... An Amulet of Life Protection, Robe of the Eyes, Scale
Mail +3, Triple H (Heward's Handy Haversack or something like that), and a couple potions.
The Amulet and Triple H were given to Mangra, the Robe to Krytir, and the rest was unclaimed.
Krytir started acting funny, now having a Strength and Intelligence of 3 from the Robe of Thoughtlessness,
and Mangra's Amulet wasn't what it seemed to be either. So we spent 8,500 gold in jewelry to
heal Krytir, and then decided to go shopping. We traded in some Magical Scale Mail, Chain Mail,
the Amulet, some potions, and some money to get some Magical Plate Mail, a Short Sword, a Ring,
and put a down payment on some Gauntlets. We would have purchased more but the Mage was stubborn
and wouldn't take Jewelry as payment.
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With the shopping spree completed and everyone well rested, trained, and healed we left Brick
City and headed towards the wooded area in the North East where Gunther awaits our arrival.
We traveled for days without any incident, and then while we were riding in a valley we heared
a voice, "You are surrounded, drop your weapons!" So we looked around for our would-be robbers,
and all we saw was an orc... that is one foot tall. We ignored him and just continued to trot
along. So the orcs attacked, throwing tooth picks... which never got to us. We encountered
a small group of wild horses, and Blurp caught one. We encountered a very small group of rabbits,
and Blurp accidentally stepped on them. We encountered a halfling... err a mini-Hill Giant,
and Malyus caught it with a bearhug and made it pass out. Our adventures did not end there,
we also came upon a boot and a small pond. Blurp and Mangra needed to refill their water skins,
so Mangra went for the water and we saw him shrink to a man that is one foot tall. Though he
didn't believe he was one foot tall, and continued to try to do everything he did before. He
rode the wild horse after that, and we placed his backpack on his old horse.
Our journey continued to the north, and as night was coming upon us we came across an encampment
of travelling nomads :). We were met by a few guards and are allowed into their camp. We met
with their chief, and explained our little problem with Mangra to him. The chief believed that
he could help our friend, and he was successful in returning Mangra to normal. We learned that
this group of nomads were of the Lukor, the clan of Gunther's cousin, and that they were heading
to the Kauth Gathering at Gunther's Keep. We were confused, and told them that we didn't expect
a Gathering to take place at this time, and they pointed out that they had just been told about
the Gathering this week and that it was in fact taking place early.
As we left the nomads, we continued north east and encountered three hungry griffons, and Malyus
roasted one of them, tasted like chicken, and the other two were dispatched easily also. So our
travels continued and we came upon an army, bearing the banner of the Lukor. Unsure of whether
we could trust them, we avoided them and spotted a small group of seven people on horseback
riding past us, and Malyus recognized the leader of the group by his black and red robes... It
was Master Dilherst. We followed him to the army's camp, and eventually all the tales were told
of us acquiring the Windsword and why the gathering was taking place so early... to crown Robert
the Warhammer, of House Deleuse, as King.
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